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Thursday, October 24, 2013

It is time...

Reading back on my posts a year on and how time flies when you're not having fun. Because I'm pretty damn sure, working full time is not my idea of fun. At least this realization has hit well before retirement! Anyway back to the point, looking back I was correct. I had an inkling that my little newborn boy was going to be a full on time consuming bundle of kicking, tantrum bundle of joy. And that he is. One minute he has me in tears of laughter and the next tears of frustation. But I am pretty sure written down in history somewhere it explains that, that's just motherhood! So as the year has passed I am not really sure if I have grown up or moved on in the world but I have survived. Survived nappies, tantrums, work colleagues, the angst of quitting a job after ten years, the ups and low low downs of marriage and everything else in between. In between like pre-teen bullies of master ten, major supermarket melt downs of mr 2, twelve hour days of the hubster,the daily grind of breakfast, lunch and dinner for four before and after a 40 hour week, the monster in law, the motherly monster herself and sad deteriorating ageing of grandparents. The list goes on and will hopefully transpire into many funny tales over the coming weeks. This blog is something I often think about and regret neglecting. But regret and guilt are my regular companions as any mumma will know. Play with the boys and have guilt for not cleaning, work and have guilt for not being a mummy, don't work and feel for my colleagues picking up the slack, time with the kids often means daddy neglect. But enough of the negatives, that time is over. I am and always have been a positive person but this year got the better of me, I have been too focused on the guilt and what I'm missing instead of remembering what I have. And so here is my pledge, my new intention. The intention to write, write because I love to write and write yes sometimes to release and b*tch and moan but to focus on the positives and always look for the silver lining. Life is short. Way too short for guilt and regret. Especially when my children are growing before my eyes, some things may need to change so positiveness comes much easier. But this is a journey that starts now. It is time. Every day is a blessing, even if it includes 38 loads of washing, 3 annoying colleagues, one annoying husband and fighting pooing machines knows as kiddies. Sweet Dreams xx